Scratch
Here you will find older scratches, musings and other detritus that once were located on the front pages, but have now faded.
Filed away here to collect dust and cobwwwebs in perpetuity, links may break, facts may change and data may corrupt.
On occasion I may come down here to tidy, but for the most, I prefer to leave the past where it lies.
Manners
Over the last few days Sal has been reading Talk to the Hand: The Utter Bloody Rudeness of Everyday Life (or Six Good Reasons to Stay Home and Bolt the Door) by Lynne Truss, and as a result has commented how she has started noticing certain things more.
Now on the way home last night I was about to disembark from the tube at the single doors at the end of a carriage, and someone stepped on. It was clear that he was never going to be able to pass me yet he tried anyway. I just stood there. Time passed. Not an incredible amount otherwise I would have had to get off at Ealing Broadway and headed back, but enough to make it clear I wasn't moving. Now I was wondering whether I should say anything or capitulate, but before I could, the man stepped back out of the train, into the mass of people. As I passed (although more like pushed) my way through I said 'Thank you' trying to sound sincere, and proceeded on the way home. Now Sal who had stepped off further up the train, commented that the people who I had forced to wait all looked at me incredulously. As we were discussing this whilst walking home, a cyclist moved up behind us and started ringing their bell. We stepped aside and let them pass, waiting for a thank you.
None came, and given that we were on a pavement with a perfectly good road next to us, this further prompted our irkedness.
Now the question is thus. Are we irked because we expect too much from people - that we will receive as good as (I hope) we give? And if so, should we be offended by other peoples lack of manners or their ability to reach 'our' expectations? If we set these too high, are we doomed to be perpetually disappointed, and conversely, if we set them too low, are we not giving people the benefit of the doubt, and thereby somehow acting to our own detriment.
I always thought that we should always look for the best in people. Perhaps this is an outdated view. Increasingly though it seems to be getting harder to find the good.
23 Nov 2005 10:34 | (2) comments | Thoughts
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Comments
Can you just wait for people to do as they should do and get out of the way? Or do you have to make use of your elbows?
I guess it depends how much of a hurry I'm in!
[btw, I hope I haven't been lurking here for too long :$ ]
Posted by: chris | November 24, 2005 12:40 AM
Its usually rush hour that causes the problems in relation to people on the platfrom. Individual people tend not to be so bad, but once the numbers start increasing they tend to huddle together which is where the problems occur. It doesn't help that most commuters know exactly where the doors are, so people who don't tend to clump around them, not always on the outer sides. No such queuing as I would've thought you get at bus stops..?
If I can I wait for people to move out the way just by standing there looking offended, I do. When that fails I tend to move abruptly turning myself side on to minimise the effect and step towards whomever looks either most arrogant or is pushing others aside. By either delaying them, pushing them back or just blocking the way, it allows everyone else on around me.
:)
Posted by: skitz | November 24, 2005 06:43 PM